All of my new buddies are writing things in books now. I have not really used books much in my life. A shock, I know. Anyway, I am starting too.
Today I met a lesbian, and it seems they are the natural predator of the gnome race. I saw and spoke to one, and she told me she liked to eat things. It was odd. I also met my old friend Ayden. We talked around a fire, but he wanted to be alone, so I left him to himself. Afterwords, we fought some big boners. At least, I think they were boners. I heard Reaver talking about a boner once, and I was confused for the longest time, until the boners come and attack us. I whacked off like 4 boners myself that night, but no one noticed.
See, we had this gnome, and while he was safe from the lesbian, I think I might have told people he worshiped Tiamat. SHe is a big dragon with five heads. FIVE HEADS!!!! I bet she gets hungry a lot with that many heads. Maybe she should eat with lesbains, since they eat stuff a lot and all.
I am glad to be back with my pals again. Prison was not muc fun. I only got in like 4 fights when I was locked up. But since they came back, I have had many glorious battles. I love battling things and triumphing. I also like kittens. They are soft and funny.
I hope we don’t have to kill the gnome Grep. He is always healing me and stuff. Maybe Tiamat isn’t so bad….then again, people really don’t like her. Maybe she is all bad.
I have an idea! If I kill Tiamat….not only will I be the dragonborn who killed a god….but then Grep wont have to worship her and everything will be ok again. I am so smart. I come up with great ideas. Alondro says I should tell him my ideas first, and then he’ll tell me if everyone else is ready for them. He is a good friend.
Until the Mountains crumble Ashkor